How to set realistic and compelling goals

· Coaching

You often feel overwhelmed and frustrated when you try to change your life. There is so much to change, isn't it?

You want to change your job.

You feel stuck in a relationship that does not sound and feel right anymore.

Your debts have been mounting over the years and now you have no idea to get out of the mess.

You always wanted to live in an different country. That has become increasingly difficult because the world is changing. We need to learn to live in the NOW and not think too much ahead into our future.

And that is why setting realistic goals for our immediate future is so important.

Although I planned my life ahead of time and live the life I wanted to live, I am aware setting realistic and compelling goals will always be something to keep in mind when wanting to change your life.

When I was in my late twenties, I lived in Spain for 6 months. I decided to give my boyfriend who had moved to Spain one year before I followed him. I gave myself the chance to find out whether I wanted to live in Spain for good and be in the relationship with my boyfriend. I knew that if it does not work out, I would have a definite plan to go back to London, United Kingdom where I had already spent 8 months previously.

To cut the story short, my boyfriend and I broke up and I decided to move back to London.

To achieve that goal I had to earn money to be able to kick start my life in London. I traveled back to Germany and lived with my parents for the next 4 months. During that time, I worked as a temp in a department store so that I could earn money to move back to London.

I achieved my goal within the 4 months I had planned. I bought my flight ticket and moved back to the accommodation in London where I stayed before. At the beginning of 1996, I started to look for a temping job and enrolled into the first travel and tourism course. My dream was to work in the travel industry. I knew I would improve my chances of getting a job I desired if I had studied beforehand.

Here are some tips and inspirations for you:

1) Write a list of the goals you want to accomplish within one year. Then decide which one is the MOST IMPORTANT one that will catapult you towards achieving your goal.

2) Take action daily, weekly and monthly. Write in a journal what steps you need to take and record your progress.

3) If you are not sure what you want to do, think back of your childhood. What were you passionate about doing when you were little? I remember that I always wanted to write books and travel the world.

4) If you are still not sure, ask your friends and family about the things you are good at. They will give you surprisingly great answers.

5) Ask yourself: What would I do if the world was going to end in a week? This puts you in touch with what is really important to you.

6) My favourite coaching questions are: What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail? And: What is the worst that could happen if you did try? Take some time to think about the answers. You might be surprised what your mind comes up with.

When you are thinking about a compelling goal, you need to find out how important is it for you to achieve your goal. How much do you want it?

Is this your goal? Often people work to achieve goals that are not their own. They find it hard to do a job they were told to do. And this pressure often comes from our parents. They mean well when they tell us that we have to earn money to make ends meet. That the job we should do helps us to earn a steady income. But this is not what work life and life in general is all about.

You need to do the work you are passionate about. It has to be something that is aligned with your passions, hobbies, talents and gifts. The work should be aligned with your values and beliefs. It is very difficult to do work you are not convinced about. Your soul will hurt and eventually, you will become ill. It will begin with headaches, stomach cramps and nausea. These signs are your gut or so-called intuition telling you to stop and rethink your life.

Let's recap.

Think about a realistic goal which you can achieve within a year or so.

Make a list of the steps you need to take to get the ball rolling and take daily baby steps.

Write everything in a journal to record your progress.

Celebrate every small success along the way. Treat yourself with a good book, a hot bath or buy yourself that sexy dress you have seen in the shops or online.

Book your discovery session today to get the ball rolling.
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